Wednesday, February 22, 2006
In The Mood For A Nice Rug Down
Back in November, it was time for the rug in the 51 Faxon Street den to come up. Why would a nice wine-red rug that had only been put down a few years ago need to be thrown out so soon? Rollie, the "free-pissing, I can go to the bathroom anywhere I like at anytime" beagle. That red rug could only withstand so many golden showers and steamy dog poos until it was time to have mercy on its carpet soul and put it out of its misery.
Nick, Emily, and I were all in Braintree for the weekend, and getting rid of the old rug and putting down a new rug was one of the projects my Mom had in store for us (another was to clean the cellar, but that's a whole other column in and of itself, folks). Taking a rug up and replacing it with a new one doesn't sound like a monumental task, but when you have a den crammed with so much furniture and...things, it's a lot harder than it looks.
Mom and Dad were home at the time we did this. No, they didn't actually help with anything, but they did a fabulous job of standing at the doorway and barking out (usually conflicting) directions. Menial household chore supervision- catch the fever!
The old area rug was underneath every large item in the room- sofa, giant TV and TV stand, recliner, chair, end table, coffee table, numerous stacks of unread books, etc. We took it up corner by corner, revealing a wooden floor unerneath that in certain parts looked like it was rotting from canine urine overexposure. It was nasty. Within moments, everyone was yelling at Rollie, telling him what a bad dog he was- I'm sure he was ridden with longterm guilt over all this. Was that regret expressed when he licked my hand, or did he just smell traces of roast beef?
By shifting everything around, the contaminated rug (was I really doing pushups on that thing yesterday?!) was eventually pulled up, rolled up, and promptly thrown out, its glory years clearly in the past.
At this point, we all questioned my Mom as to why we had to put another rug down. Some of us liked the look of a wooden floor, while others thought it was imprudent to lay down yet another rug for Rollie to ruin. And best of all, this rug was white! Yup, no problem keeping that one looking clean and new. I suppose the only plus side to the light shade was that there'd be no guessing to where Rollie had last taken a leak.
Mom had gotten a padding to go underneath the new rug this time. That was laid out without a fuss, but it was clearly too big. Once the rug was down, there's be some cutting required to trim it down to size.
Nick and I carried the new rug, still rolled up and taped, into the den from the dining room/ new carpet storage facility. While we started unrolling it, the real problems began. We didn't have a lot of room to work with, and with al the furniture the rug had to go under, we couldn't unroll it all at once. On cue, everyone started voicing their opinion on how best to get this carpet down with the least amount of fuss. Was it a shock that all 5 opinions varied dramatically? At this point, it shouldn't have been.
Eventually, a winning technique was discovered and successfully employed, and the fresh white area rug was soon in its proper place. Our faces were red and our breath was cut short while our faces glowed with perspiration, half from the physical work and the other half from stress.
But wait! The cushion mat underneath the carpet still had to be cut down to size! We had to hurry- the Patriots game was imminent and kickoff would soon be upon us.
We tried using an actual carpet cutter, but the blade seemed a bit too dull. I grabbed some plain old scissors and they seemed to get the job done, albeit very slowly with a strenuous hand tendon workout.
By the time the job was done. We were pooped.
Yet unlike our dog, Rollie, we refrained from actually pooping on the new rug.
Nick, Emily, and I were all in Braintree for the weekend, and getting rid of the old rug and putting down a new rug was one of the projects my Mom had in store for us (another was to clean the cellar, but that's a whole other column in and of itself, folks). Taking a rug up and replacing it with a new one doesn't sound like a monumental task, but when you have a den crammed with so much furniture and...things, it's a lot harder than it looks.
Mom and Dad were home at the time we did this. No, they didn't actually help with anything, but they did a fabulous job of standing at the doorway and barking out (usually conflicting) directions. Menial household chore supervision- catch the fever!
The old area rug was underneath every large item in the room- sofa, giant TV and TV stand, recliner, chair, end table, coffee table, numerous stacks of unread books, etc. We took it up corner by corner, revealing a wooden floor unerneath that in certain parts looked like it was rotting from canine urine overexposure. It was nasty. Within moments, everyone was yelling at Rollie, telling him what a bad dog he was- I'm sure he was ridden with longterm guilt over all this. Was that regret expressed when he licked my hand, or did he just smell traces of roast beef?
By shifting everything around, the contaminated rug (was I really doing pushups on that thing yesterday?!) was eventually pulled up, rolled up, and promptly thrown out, its glory years clearly in the past.
At this point, we all questioned my Mom as to why we had to put another rug down. Some of us liked the look of a wooden floor, while others thought it was imprudent to lay down yet another rug for Rollie to ruin. And best of all, this rug was white! Yup, no problem keeping that one looking clean and new. I suppose the only plus side to the light shade was that there'd be no guessing to where Rollie had last taken a leak.
Mom had gotten a padding to go underneath the new rug this time. That was laid out without a fuss, but it was clearly too big. Once the rug was down, there's be some cutting required to trim it down to size.
Nick and I carried the new rug, still rolled up and taped, into the den from the dining room/ new carpet storage facility. While we started unrolling it, the real problems began. We didn't have a lot of room to work with, and with al the furniture the rug had to go under, we couldn't unroll it all at once. On cue, everyone started voicing their opinion on how best to get this carpet down with the least amount of fuss. Was it a shock that all 5 opinions varied dramatically? At this point, it shouldn't have been.
Eventually, a winning technique was discovered and successfully employed, and the fresh white area rug was soon in its proper place. Our faces were red and our breath was cut short while our faces glowed with perspiration, half from the physical work and the other half from stress.
But wait! The cushion mat underneath the carpet still had to be cut down to size! We had to hurry- the Patriots game was imminent and kickoff would soon be upon us.
We tried using an actual carpet cutter, but the blade seemed a bit too dull. I grabbed some plain old scissors and they seemed to get the job done, albeit very slowly with a strenuous hand tendon workout.
By the time the job was done. We were pooped.
Yet unlike our dog, Rollie, we refrained from actually pooping on the new rug.
Friday, February 17, 2006
Delayed DVD Releases
Is HBO ever going to release Dream On on DVD? I've probably only seen 3 or 4 episodes of the old HBO show, but I thought it was hilarious, especially with all those old film clips expertly interspersed throughout each episode. I caught a few late-night reruns a few years ago, and I've been waiting for a DVD release ever since. Maybe they think it will be too expensive to release on DVD and that not enough people will buy it to justify the work.
I think that's what might have happened with The Larry Sanders Show. They put the first season on DVD back in 2001. You could tell they didn't care too much about it because the transfer was less than stellar, or perhaps they just didn't bother storing the negatives properly. Studios will shell out big bucks to restore old classics like Gond With The Wind or Vertigo, but Season One of Larry Sanders? Not quite in the budget yet.
So that first season came out, and then that was it. Five years later, and the rest of the series still hasn't made it onto disc. Maybe I could find a weekly late night Sunday rerun of it on the UPN, but I'm not that hard up. Plus, I want to watch them in sequential order.
You walk into any Walmart today and take a look at the dregs they have in the DVD bargain bins. Garbage! Junk! Movies you'd have to pay ME to watch (and even then I wouldn't pay attention). Some of the most pitiful, forgetful movies ever made are on DVD, but you're telling me it's too much trouble to put Larry Sanders and Dream On on a digital media format?!
If that's not bad enough, there are still some classic, Oscar-calibre movies not out on DVD. If you want to watch Reds, the only way you can see it today, in the year 2006, is on a 25-year-old VHS tape from the Blockbuster drama aisle. That's a freakin' travesty, folks. If some studio can find the time to release The Beastmaster on dvd, don't you think it's about time Reds got the same treatment?! Someone's dropping the ball somewhere, but they didn't drop it on my DVD of Reds because it doesn't freakin' exist yet!
I think that's what might have happened with The Larry Sanders Show. They put the first season on DVD back in 2001. You could tell they didn't care too much about it because the transfer was less than stellar, or perhaps they just didn't bother storing the negatives properly. Studios will shell out big bucks to restore old classics like Gond With The Wind or Vertigo, but Season One of Larry Sanders? Not quite in the budget yet.
So that first season came out, and then that was it. Five years later, and the rest of the series still hasn't made it onto disc. Maybe I could find a weekly late night Sunday rerun of it on the UPN, but I'm not that hard up. Plus, I want to watch them in sequential order.
You walk into any Walmart today and take a look at the dregs they have in the DVD bargain bins. Garbage! Junk! Movies you'd have to pay ME to watch (and even then I wouldn't pay attention). Some of the most pitiful, forgetful movies ever made are on DVD, but you're telling me it's too much trouble to put Larry Sanders and Dream On on a digital media format?!
If that's not bad enough, there are still some classic, Oscar-calibre movies not out on DVD. If you want to watch Reds, the only way you can see it today, in the year 2006, is on a 25-year-old VHS tape from the Blockbuster drama aisle. That's a freakin' travesty, folks. If some studio can find the time to release The Beastmaster on dvd, don't you think it's about time Reds got the same treatment?! Someone's dropping the ball somewhere, but they didn't drop it on my DVD of Reds because it doesn't freakin' exist yet!
Thursday, February 16, 2006
BJ Averell on The Amazing Race
Just found out tonight that a friend I knew from college, BJ Averell, is going to be on the new edition of The Amazing Race premiering at the end of this month. Check out his webpage over at CBS.com. He's one of the funniest, craziest guys I encountered during my 4 years at Harvard, and I can't wait to see him on the show.
BJ was in the big improv group on campus, was in all the Hasty Pudding Shows, wrote a daily comic strip depicting the college president, Neil Rudenstine, and Cornell West, managed to get arrested when trying to get home one Thanksgiving by sneaking onto an airplane at Logan Airport, and he co-hosted the giganticly successful BJ Show with none other than BJ Novak, who's since gone onto write for and co-star in The Office with Steve Carrell.
When he got arrested for being a stow away on that plane, he took a great photo for The Crimson to run with their story the next day- looking all tough and badass with his hair slicked and a sporting giant pair of aviator sunglasses. After that he sort of became a cult figure around campus.
I haven't seen BJ since I graduated, so it's been a few years, and he definitely looks a little different with that long hair and shaggy beard. Even if he and his partner fail miserably, I know he's going to be hysterical and outrageous regardless of how he finishes.
BJ was in the big improv group on campus, was in all the Hasty Pudding Shows, wrote a daily comic strip depicting the college president, Neil Rudenstine, and Cornell West, managed to get arrested when trying to get home one Thanksgiving by sneaking onto an airplane at Logan Airport, and he co-hosted the giganticly successful BJ Show with none other than BJ Novak, who's since gone onto write for and co-star in The Office with Steve Carrell.
When he got arrested for being a stow away on that plane, he took a great photo for The Crimson to run with their story the next day- looking all tough and badass with his hair slicked and a sporting giant pair of aviator sunglasses. After that he sort of became a cult figure around campus.
I haven't seen BJ since I graduated, so it's been a few years, and he definitely looks a little different with that long hair and shaggy beard. Even if he and his partner fail miserably, I know he's going to be hysterical and outrageous regardless of how he finishes.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
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